Parental Alienation

  Dear O and C, I’m feeling a bit better today.  Some days are just too difficult to write.  Yesterday, I was weighed down by a deep, dark sadness.  It took over my mind, my body, and my soul, and I wasn’t able to get anything down on paper, or even formulate any coherent thoughts for that matter.  But today, I’m doing better; so, I write.   I’ll pick up where we left off last; approaching the summer of 2021.  By this time, I was just searching for any reprieve from the custody battle that I could find.  We had just finished up the last quarter of the school year, and successfully completed a hybrid education model.  I was happy that the students who wanted to be back in the classroom had an opportunity to do so, and those who didn’t, could still learn from home.  It was definitely a small victory, and I’d take any victory I could get at this point. Prior to summer break, I also learned that your mother’s request for a restraini...

Dear O and C, My apologies, I can’t write today. My heart is plagued with too much sadness.  I hope you’ll understand.   Love,  Dad

Dear O and C, I lived the next month or so of my life in complete fear.  I didn’t know who I could trust.  I didn’t know who was watching me.  I was terrified that I might be formally charged with something serious and would have to stand trial based on your mothers’ alleged abuse and stalking claims.  I began to grow paranoid.  I would see a car parked out in front of my house, and wonder if it might be a private investigator hired by your mother.  Nothing seemed out of the realm at this point. Life was difficult.  I felt as though I had to live my life absolutely mistake free, which, if you’re a human being, is impossible.   All of these situations put a tremendous amount of stress on my relationship with R.  We were hanging on by a thread.  We were attending couples counseling at this point, which was helping a little bit.  However, we had been through so much together, there were many issues to work through.  We ha...

  Dear O and C, The next few months I would attempt to go on about my life, in a business-as-usual type of way.  School was still distance learning, and I was still trying to adapt to my new way of having to teach Physical Education from home, virtually.  There was a lull in the custody battle as I had temporarily stepped away in an attempt to regain some normalcy and calm.  In a way it was working.  It was nice to not have to worry about being served court papers by your mother and her team of attorneys.  Prior to now, the process server would regularly be waiting outside of my house, and would approach me in my driveway when I got home from work.  It felt like such an invasion of privacy, and was very uncomfortable the first couple of times.  After a while, like everything else in life, I got used to it.  I actually made a game of it.  If I had a day where I wasn’t served papers or harassed via email by your mothers’ attorneys, I con...

  Dear O and C, I miss you both dearly.  You are my everything: my heart, my soul, and my world.  I love you to the moon and back.  I love you more than all the stars in the sky.  When you look up at night and see the stars and the moon, just know that I am looking at the same stars and the same moon.  I hope this gives you a little peace of mind, and makes you feel like we are together.   Birthdays still hurt.  O, I missed you turning 10 years old.  That stung.  Not being able to see you, tell you I love you, wish you a happy birthday, nothing; it hurts.  Of course, I bought you a gift and wrote you a card. Both are sitting here in your bedroom, at my house.  Not being able to call you, write to you, or even email or text with you, is so painful.  I couldn’t make sense of it.  I could understand not being able to see you, because of what the court had decided, but not being able to have any form of communica...

Dear O and C, It was time for me to rebuild my life.  Everything I had known and loved had been taken from me and destroyed.  I can only imagine how the two of you felt.  You must have been so confused, hurt, and frustrated by the situation.  You should know I prayed for you, and still do, every single night.  I pray that the two of you are happy, healthy, loved, and well taken care of.  I pray that you are eating healthy food.  I pray that you are getting plenty of exercise.  I pray that you both have warm beds to sleep in.  I pray that you have nice clothes to wear to school.  I pray that you are doing well in school.  I pray that you are kind to other kids, and that in return, other kids are kind to you.  I pray that you have friends to hang out with.  I pray that you get to spend time with your mom’s side of the family, and that they are extra loving to you. I pray that your mom is taking good care of you, and that s...

  Dear O and C, I apologize that some of the information in here might be tough for you to read, understand, or comprehend.  I can assure you that I am here for you, and I always will be, should you ever want to talk about anything.  I also want you to know I have always been right here for you, even though I was not allowed to show you.  I was not allowed to communicate with you in any way, I was always thinking about you.  I was always talking about you boys with my friends and family.  I was writing about you in my journal.  I wrote you emails.  I texted your mother on your birthdays, and asked her to wish you a happy birthday from me.  I painted pictures for you.  Every day, I take a walk for you, and look for loose change on the ground.  When I find any, I say a prayer for you and put the money in your coke bottle bank.  It’s probably up to a couple hundred dollars by now.  When it’s full, I’m going to fill another ...

  Dear O and C, I apologize that some of the information in here might be tough for you to read, understand, or comprehend.  I can assure you that I am here for you, and I always will be, should you ever want to talk about anything.  I also want you to know I have always been right here for you, even though I was not allowed to show you.  Even though I was was not allowed to communicate with you in any way, I was always thinking about you.  I was always talking about you to my friends and family.  I was writing about you in my journal.  I wrote you emails.  I texted your mother on your birthdays, and asked her to wish you a happy birthday from me.  I painted pictures for you.  Every day, I take a walk for you, and look for loose change on the ground.  When I find any, I say a prayer for you and put the money in your coke bottle bank.  It’s probably up to a couple hundred dollars by now.  When it’s full, I’m going to fill...