Parental Alienation

Dear O and C, I’m sorry for all of the hurt and the pain that I’ve caused.  I did the best I could as a father.  Being a parent is very difficult.  There is a lot of responsibility involved.  I always told myself that I was going to be a better father to you than my dad was to me.  Truth be told, now that I have a chance to reflect, my dad was never a bad dad.  I just wished I got to spend more time with him.  I was only five years old when my parents divorced.  It was very hard on me, so I can only imagine how hard it must have been, and still is, for you.  I missed my dad very much after my parents got divorced.  I primarily lived at my grandparent’s house with my mom. I was able to see my dad every other weekend, but it never felt like enough time.  And, the time I did get to spend with my dad wasn't always a good time.  He always had girlfriends around, and oftentimes he would pay more attention to them than he would my b...

Dear O and C, On Wednesday, September 8, 2020, I got the worst phone call I’ve ever received in my life. It was a lawyer.  She was mean, stern and downright nasty.  Right away, she told me that if I did not comply with your mother’s requests, then I would lose you both forever.  She threatened my job, saying, “Now, wouldn’t it be unfortunate if your employer found out about your incident?”  She told me I could possibly go to jail. Basically, by signing the document, I was agreeing to the following: that I had been abusive to you both and your mother, that I was an alcoholic, and that I would attend a 6-month inpatient treatment program (which would have forced me to quit my job by the way).  I couldn’t agree to any of that.  And I definitely didn’t agree to giving up my time with you boys: my pride and joy.  Despite the lawyers’ awful threats, and mean and nasty language, I wouldn’t sign.  I refused to sign away my rights as a father or acknowle...

Dear O and C, Before I continue with the timeline of events, I want to reflect upon the day each of you were born and give you a glimpse of my relationship with each of you from the start.  I remember both of those days like it was yesterday.  From the minute you were born, I loved you more than I had ever loved anything before.   O, when you were born, your mother went through a very intensive labor.  We were in the hospital for two nights, and you weren’t budging.  Your mother was covered head to toe in a rash, and was experiencing a tremendous amount of pain.  They gave her an epidural, in hopes that it would control the pain, help her dilate, and help you to come out.  No such luck.  On October 1 st , 2011,  at 7am, they performed an emergency c-section to take you out.  I was in shock when I saw you for the first time.  I began to cry instantly.  You were so beautiful.  I couldn’t believe how big you were, 9 lbs a...

Dear O and C,       First off, let me start by saying, I’m sorry.  I’m sorry for any pain and hurt I’ve caused you.  I’m sorry for any hurt and pain I’ve caused your mother.  I’m sorry that your mom and I got a divorce.  I’m sorry that, previous to the divorce, your mom and I argued and fought all the time.  I’m sorry that after the divorce, R and I fought in front of you.  I’m sorry I didn’t stop drinking right away, after the divorce.  I’m sorry you had to move out of your house. I’m sorry I haven’t spoken to you in over a year.  It’s not my choice.  I’ve tried to write to you. I’ve sent letters, postcards, and emails.  I’ve called and texted your mother asking if I could speak to you, and I haven’t heard anything back.  Every attempt I made, your mother accused me of “love bombing” you.  I’m sorry that I can’t see you, talk to you, or be with you every second of every day.  I miss you both so much....

I am a father who has been alienated from his two children, O and C. The alienation began in September 2020. Hearing the judge grant full custody to my ex wife was the worst moment of my life.  I was in complete shock and disbelief.  I had an out of body experience, and thought I must be dreaming.  I could not comprehend the decision that had just been made. The pain and heartache that followed from that point on was unbearable.  I wanted to die on numerous occasions.  I followed the court order to the T, and yet, no progress could be made because my ex wife and her attorney sabotaged every effort I made.  It was a losing battle the moment the judge made her decision, and I knew it.  I tried to keep hope alive, but my hopes kept getting destroyed every time a new declaration was filed with the court, every time a new series of false accusations were made, every time the judge made a new ruling in my ex-wife's favor.  I could not catch a break...