12/24/25
Dear O and C,
I miss you so much! This will be our 5th Christmas without each other. It really is devastating. Your mom, her attorneys, the courts, among other people alienated us from each other over 5 years ago. And yet, not one of those people or entities has done anything to reunify us. It's a travesty beyond imagination. I'm part of a few groups who are trying to reform the family court system and hold the alienators liable, but I'm not hopeful anything will ever be resolved in our case. It's very frustrating to know that so many people worked so hard to absolutely destroy our relationship, and yet nobody will be held accountable. The very system that tore us apart won't do not a single thing to try and bring us back together and repair the harm. I've written the court several times to see if there is anything they can do; i've never heard back from them. I've written your mother many many times, asking her for any help she can give to reunite us. She has ignored or denied every last one of my requests. A few months back, she did agree to set up an email account for you, so I could write to you. I've written you 5 emails now, and have not heard a response. I'm convinced you don't really have access to the account. In fact, I'm guessing your mother set up the account to collect evidence, hoping I might say something inappropriate, so she can take me back to court, or use it to further alienated me from you. The saddest part about all of this, is that you two think your mothers behavior is normal. You think it is normal to grow up without a father, and have absolutely no contact with me. A father, who I might add, has done tireless amounts of work to become a better father for the two of you. A father, who loves you more than anything in the world, and would stop at nothing to prove himself too you. But the truth is, even if you were allowed to listen to me, you wouldn't hear me anyway. You've been so brainwashed, you truly in your hearts believe I am your enemy, and a bad person. That couldn't be further from the truth. I am your ally, and a wonderful person too; kind, loving, patient, and honest. If you are ever able to read these letters, I want you to know, that I am here for you no matter what. No matter how much time has passed, I will always be your father. I will always love you more than anything in the world. If you ever need an ear to listen to you, or a shoulder to lean on, I am here. If you ever want to tell me how awful I am, and all the ways I messed up, I'm here for that too. I take ownership of my mistakes, and I hope some day we can work through them together, and move forward. I hope someday you will allow me back into your lives. I hope we can repair all of the damage that has been done to our relationship. I hope you will allow me to tell you the truth, and open to hearing my side of things. I hope you will understand that I am not a monster and the devil you think I am. I hope you understand that I am just a father who loves you. A father who made mistakes and suffered from them tremendously; but a father who also learned from them, and grew extraordinarily. Boys, I wish you a very merry Christmas, and I wish for you the truth. You deserve that. You shouldn't have to live lives built on lies, mistrust, and denial. You shouldn't have to deny the fact that you have a father; you always will, and your father will always be me. You deserve to know the truth, and you deserve to feel comfortable and safe enough to tell people your truth. The truth will never go away, and I hope that someday you are able to accept it and embrace it. Someday I hope you will use it as fuel for your success and embrace it as a powerful sense of who you really are. I am and always will be a part of you, and vice versa, and it's long overdue that we share that together. I love you so much. May God be with you.
Love,
Dad
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