11/06/22

Dear O and C,

I love you so very much!  I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately.  I’m very happy with how our group therapy sessions are going.  It’s been a lot of fun playing four square, darts, bey blades, and baseball.  Tomorrow, I’m going to bring a nerf basketball hoop, so we can play basketball.  I know it’s been difficult to open up to me, but I so appreciate your valiant efforts to do so thus far.  You’ve expressed how you are upset with me for being abusive towards you and feeding you alcohol (I let each of you try a sip of beer).  I’ve owned up to, and apologized for both.  However, I know it’s going to take you a long time before you start trusting me again.  Building a solid and trustworthy foundation for our relationship is going to take time; and there’s nothing I’m committed to more than putting in the time and effort into you boys and our future.  I’ve learned so much new information about the two of you in our visits.  I’ve learned that O’s favorite football team is the Rams and C’s is the Panthers.  I’ve learned that O’s favorite animal is a duck, and C doesn’t have a favorite (it used to be a sloth).  I’ve learned that O was a duck for Halloween, and C was a Crow.  I’ve learned that C is playing baseball, and O wants to play basketball.  I’ve learned that O’s favorite basketball player is Michael Jordan, and C’s is Kobe Bryant.  I’ve learned that O’s favorite color is now red, and C’s is still Blue.  I’ve learned so much information about you boys during our visits, and I look forward to learning so much more.  I soak up everything you say like a sponge.  I am so invested in your lives, and I look forward to becoming someone you can trust and love again.  I’ve been able to hug you guys at the end of each visit, which has been very nice.  I know your walls are still up, and with good reason.  I look forward to proving to you that I am worthy of being your father, and hopefully your walls will start to come down soon.  Albeit slow, I am very happy with the progress we have made so far.  I have no idea where this journey is going to lead us, but I’m hopeful that each week, we will make a little more progress towards a healthy and happy father son relationship.  I am here for you now, and always.  I love the both of you so very much.  Looking forward to seeing you guys tomorrow!


Love,

Dad


PS.  R and I decided to name our baby boy CS. I’m looking forward to the day when you boys can meet him, and be loving big brothers to him. 

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